Blog Archives

Sex, Golf, And Peanut Butter . . . (Part One)

Everything Matt did, people said, he did slowly. “Matt even hurries slow,” his father stated, characterizing his son’s modus operandi. But on this early Texas evening, Matt was moving slower than usual. Although the autumn temperature was startlingly pleasant, Matt was sweating. Not just sweating a little, but sweating bullets. Although he wondered early on why he couldn’t keep his shirt dry in the air-conditioned comfort of the room – you know, like the rest of the guys there. But that thought was long gone by the time he slowly, painfully stood.

“Hi,” he said. “My name is Matt. And I am addicted to liquid morphine.” There. He had finally said it. Out loud. For the first time. And although Matt had been in treatment since the day before, this was the moment he dreaded most. His first “meeting.” Those from the “anonymous” world know exactly what a meeting is, what it looks like, feels like, smells like, tastes like. But he had never characterized himself as an addict – just a pretty normal 20-year old who had dabbled in some extra-curricular activities that happened to be both illegal and deadly. Even so, as he had prepared to go to rehab, he had imagined a dark, dank basement filled with cast-offs. The kind that you wouldn’t invite into your home. The kind that made you uncomfortable when you passed them on the street. The kind that didn’t bathe often; if at all.

But it wasn’t the hot, choking, smoke-filled environs he had imagined. He was surrounded by more than a dozen other guys who looked, felt, acted, and had once sweated, just like him. The simple act of forming the words and almost coughing them out however, provided somewhat a sense of relief for Matt. The mere admission of his addiction, and his new accountability to this group of alcoholics and drug addicts, was going to be the most uncomfortable blessing of his life.

Isn’t everyone addicted to something?

OK, I’ll be the first to stand in this meeting.

“Hi, my name is Kyle. And I’m addicted to sex, golf, and peanut butter.” I know I feel better. 🙂

24PEANUT-articleLarge

Don’t judge me.

No, I don’t have any addictions that are worthy of, or covered by those types of meetings. But yes, I am horribly flawed. As often as possible, I look to my wife for the physical intimacy. Whenever there is time (or I make time) there is always room for at least nine holes. And even when I’m swearing off sugar, the maga-supersized-jumbo virtual barrel of peanut butter in the pantry incessantly calls my name. But like you, there are parts of my life (clearly no longer hidden!) of my life that I just can’t seem to move on past. Can’t get enough. Can’t stop. Don’t really want to.

For the sake of this conversation, let’s just assume that we’re all addicted to Jesus. Put the holier-than-thou self-accolades aside, and focus on what we are on the outside. Because truthfully, isn’t that a reflection of what is on the inside??

So, now that I’ve admitted my self-indulgent behaviors, I absolutely DARE YOU to share your own in the comment box below.

We’ll see who has the wherewithal to sweat through their shirt and put it out there. Because if you want to get down to where the rubber meets the road, many if not most of us are too arrogant and proud to admit the behaviors we have that might have taken the sheen off both our egos and our marriages.

OH NO HE DIDN’T!!!

Oh, yes . . . he did.

And it’s not an arrow-shooting, finger-pointing, nanny-nanny-boo-boo kind of general accusation, but more of a recognition – a shedding of light.

In a recent Realtime poll of married women, they stated that one of the things they feel would benefit their marriages more than anything would be that at a minimum, their husbands would recognize the behaviors they project – that make them (the wives) feel less important than . . . (fill in the blank).

golf-widow

Occasionally I choose to cross-reference specific scripture with Eugene Peterson’s The Message just to see if there is perhaps a different way of seeing, or saying something about the topic written. Oh, and this one is good.

“It’s obvious, isn’t it? The place where your treasure is, is the place you will most want to be, and end up being.”  — Luke 12:34

Most translations of The Bible provide a similar text – “Wherever your treasure is, there your heart will be also.”

But what I can’t get out of my mind is the first and last parts of Peterson’s translation. It’s obvious,” and end up being.”

We’ll follow up with the conclusion of this blockbuster later in the week. And I’d encourage you to think through those two “phrases” from Peterson’s translation. What do they say to you? About you?

But for now, let’s just begin the process of getting it out there. 

And don’t worry – nobody is going to suggest that any of us give up the things in life we enjoy – at least not all of them.

But in the meantime, if you can’t seem to identify the simple addictions in your life, you might – well – ask your wife?

I double-dog dare ya’. 

Well, what ARE they? Comment box is below 🙂

(CREDITS: To Nina Roesner www.ninaroesner.com for implied permission to issue dares)

And, as always . . .

FINISH WELL!

Advertisements

Sex, Golf, And Peanut Butter . . . (Part One)

Everything Matt did, people said, he did slowly. “Matt even hurries slow,” his father stated, characterizing his son’s modus operandi. But on this early Texas evening, Matt was moving slower than usual. Although the autumn temperature was startlingly pleasant, Matt was sweating. Not just sweating a little, but sweating bullets. Although he wondered early on why he couldn’t keep his shirt dry in the air-conditioned comfort of the room – you know, like the rest of the guys there. But that thought was long gone by the time he slowly, painfully stood.

“Hi,” he said. “My name is Matt. And I am addicted to liquid morphine.” There. He had finally said it. Out loud. For the first time. And although Matt had been in treatment since the day before, this was the moment he dreaded most. His first “meeting.” Those from the “anonymous” world know exactly what a meeting is, what it looks like, feels like, smells like, tastes like. But he had never characterized himself as an addict – just a pretty normal 20-year old who had dabbled in some extra-curricular activities that happened to be both illegal and deadly. Even so, as he had prepared to go to rehab, he had imagined a dark, dank basement filled with cast-offs. The kind that you wouldn’t invite into your home. The kind that made you uncomfortable when you passed them on the street. The kind that didn’t bathe often; if at all.

But it wasn’t the hot, choking, smoke-filled environs he had imagined. He was surrounded by more than a dozen other guys who looked, felt, acted, and had once sweated, just like him. The simple act of forming the words and almost coughing them out however, provided somewhat a sense of relief for Matt. The mere admission of his addiction, and his new accountability to this group of alcoholics and drug addicts, was going to be the most uncomfortable blessing of his life.

Isn’t everyone addicted to something?

OK, I’ll be the first to stand in this meeting.

“Hi, my name is Kyle. And I’m addicted to sex, golf, and peanut butter.” I know I feel better. 🙂

24PEANUT-articleLarge

Don’t judge me.

No, I don’t have any addictions that are worthy of, or covered by those types of meetings. But yes, I am horribly flawed. As often as possible, I look to my wife for the physical intimacy. Whenever there is time (or I make time) there is always room for at least nine holes. And even when I’m swearing off sugar, the maga-supersized-jumbo virtual barrel of peanut butter in the pantry incessantly calls my name. But like you, there are parts of my life (clearly no longer hidden!) of my life that I just can’t seem to move on past. Can’t get enough. Can’t stop. Don’t really want to.

For the sake of this conversation, let’s just assume that we’re all addicted to Jesus. Put the holier-than-thou self-accolades aside, and focus on what we are on the outside. Because truthfully, isn’t that a reflection of what is on the inside??

So, now that I’ve admitted my self-indulgent behaviors, I absolutely DARE YOU to share your own in the comment box below.

We’ll see who has the wherewithal to sweat through their shirt and put it out there. Because if you want to get down to where the rubber meets the road, many if not most of us are too arrogant and proud to admit the behaviors we have that might have taken the sheen off both our egos and our marriages.

OH NO HE DIDN’T!!!

Oh, yes . . . he did.

And it’s not an arrow-shooting, finger-pointing, nanny-nanny-boo-boo kind of general accusation, but more of a recognition – a shedding of light.

In a recent Realtime poll of married women, they stated that one of the things they feel would benefit their marriages more than anything would be that at a minimum, their husbands would recognize the behaviors they project – that make them (the wives) feel less important than . . . (fill in the blank).

golf-widow

Occasionally I choose to cross-reference specific scripture with Eugene Peterson’s The Message just to see if there is perhaps a different way of seeing, or saying something about the topic written. Oh, and this one is good.

“It’s obvious, isn’t it? The place where your treasure is, is the place you will most want to be, and end up being.”  — Luke 12:34

Most translations of The Bible provide a similar text – “Wherever your treasure is, there your heart will be also.”

But what I can’t get out of my mind is the first and last parts of Peterson’s translation. It’s obvious,” and end up being.”

We’ll follow up with the conclusion of this blockbuster later in the week. And I’d encourage you to think through those two “phrases” from Peterson’s translation. What do they say to you? About you?

But for now, let’s just begin the process of getting it out there. 

And don’t worry – nobody is going to suggest that any of us give up the things in life we enjoy – at least not all of them.

But in the meantime, if you can’t seem to identify the simple addictions in your life, you might – well – ask your wife?

I double-dog dare ya’. 

Well, what ARE they? Comment box is below 🙂

(CREDITS: To Nina Roesner www.ninaroesner.com for implied permission to issue dares)

And, as always . . .

FINISH WELL!